How to be your authentic self—and a secret message from reality
I tire of hearing self-help, motivational rubbish that uses the phrase, "be your authentic self". It sounds so lovely used in the right context, but I have come to notice through further reflection that it makes no sense at all.
Why would you want to be authentic anyway? The illusion is that we believe being more authentic will bring us more peace of mind and happiness. I would suggest that this is misleading.
Once you realise that we all behave via our unique programming and software, that we are responding to situations via our unique belief systems and priorities of beliefs, you become aware that this notion of being unauthentic is erroneous. Yes, you may behave differently in some social situations, and yes, you may put other's needs before your own at times, but this is still you being authentic; this is what you believe you need to be doing. This stems from your system's own personal belief systems, no one else's. There no issue of authenticity here, authenticity is automatic.
Your social behavior and insecurities are simply just a reflection of your current paradigms. If you feel uncomfortable in social situations, or you feel your not able to express yourself comfortably, attempting to choose to be more authentic will not help you. Instead, it would be wise to bring awareness to your social behavior, reflect on the reasons your uncomfortable and then address those issues.
The lesson here is that we all have things to learn, and these social situations reveal our issues. As uncomfortable as they may be at times, they are helping you grow. These moments are our teachers. Every time we are in a social setting, we are helping each other to learn and grow in awareness; to grow in wisdom.
Finally, I would like to share a secret with you.
You are absolutely perfect just the way you are. While you may still have things to learn, your current level of development is perfect for this moment. Every person you run into in life is benefiting from your presence, and you from theirs. This understanding points to your true value in life.